Thursday, June 27, 2013

Final Grades: The Hobbit, The Hammer, The Talker and More!

#36 Mats "The Hobbit" Zuccarello

Dear Mats, I'm not going to lie, when they brought you back from the motherland this was my mood:
love, Siobhan (and NYR Teammates in the SO)

Dear Zuccs, When you re-signed with the Rangers we were like:
love your Fans

Dear Zuccs, Remember the plan to use your size to your advantage?
love, Elissa

Dear Mats, Thanks for coming back and taking over Richie's role in my life:
love, DZ

Dear Mats, Know what, you probably could goaltend too with the new rules...
love, Benny and The Bloggers (*Siobhan and Elissa)

Dear Mats,
love, Brian

Dear Mats, This was all kinds of amazing:
love, Siobhan

Dear Mats, Thanks for proving good players come in small sizes
love, Short People Everywhere

Dear Mats, Remember
Thanks for speaking for all of us. Love, Siobhan *I'm still bitter about his hit on Sauer...

Final Grade:

#40 Roman "Hammer" Hamrlik

Dear Hammer, If the question is: Do you get a new contract next year? The answer is:
Love, Glen

Dear Hammer, A lot of times, watching you go after the puck, we thought
love, NYR Fans

Final Grade:

#43 Martin "Marty" Biron

Dear Marty, Thanks for being the best goaltending partner ever...
love, Hank

Dear Marty, Thanks for Biron's journal...

Which is about the only view we have into the NYR player personalities...(Could you um, speak to the NYR Twitter Account and let them know to read the Columbus Blue Jackets, Kings, Stars, Canadiens and Habs Twitter accounts for examples of how to do it right? I mean, even LOU lets the DEVILS have fun....)
Thank you, love Siobhan

Dear Marty, Sometimes when you start talking, I feel
love, Viewers of Biron's Journal

Dear Marty,
but we love you anyway! love, NYR Fans

Final Grade:

#44 Steve "Emmy" Eminger

Dear Steve, When you turn the puck over, I do this
 love Elissa *Cosigned Siobhan

Dear Steve, Sometimes, when your paired with Del Zotto, we do this
love NYR Fans

Dear Steve, I don't think you get enough credit for how well you stepped up in the playoffs.
love, Siobhan
Final Grade

#44 Arron "Ash" Asham

Dear Arron, When Glen first signed you, most of us were thinking:

but then you stood up for your teammates and tolled the idiot douche NYR twitter fan base and now we feel:

love, Siobhan

Dear Arron
love, People annoyed by your "favorite" blogger

Dear Ash,
Follow this when you get on the ice:
love, Elissa

Final Grade:

#47 JT Miller

Dear JT, Remember
and there is full faith that you will have a long successful NHL career. love, the Fans

Dear JT, Your first game against the Islanders
love, Elissa and NYR Fans

Final Grade:

Tuesday, June 25, 2013

Report Card: Royal Edition

Since he played twice as hard as everyone on the team and he's royalty, the King gets his own post. We are also hopeful any and all sucking up will convince him to sign a lifetime contract (*at a reasonable rate). So that his reign over the Greatest City of them All continues. 

#30 Henrik "The King" "Hank" "Theonlyreasonwewingames" "Henke" Lundqivst


Oh Sorry, Elissa reminds me this is a Report Card and not a droolfest over how amazingly gorgeous and perfect our goaltender bad.


Dear Henrik, Next Year, we promise: 
Love, Your Teammates 

Dear Henrik, You are welcome
love, The Playoff Post

Dear Hank, This broke my heart, 
love, Siobhan (& NYR Fans)

Dear Hank, 
Because making ridiculous saves, carrying the team on your shoulders and having every hair in place at all times wasn't enough of a challenge?
love, NYR Fans

Dear Hank, Sometimes when you play I think
love, Siobhan

Dear Hank,
Have your agent
Call me. So I can call my banker to make sure we 

We shall keep you, I mean give you a contract for :

love, James Dolan, Glen Sather & NYR Organization 

Dear Henrik, I hope you have a good chiropractor because after the past few seasons your back must be hurting. 
love, the rest of the team

Dear Henrik, This BETTER be about your new contract 
love, Siobhan

Dear Henrik, Even Steven knows what's up:
love, Women NHL Fans, Women in general

Dear Henrik, 
and so does the rest of the world,
love Siobhan & Elissa

Dear Hank, Are you a Disney Prince? 

Sorry, um, got distracted again. Grades, they tell me I'm supposed to grade the Royalty of Madison Square Garden and the Kingdom of Sweden.


Dear Hank, When certain fan bases say you're overrated I always respond:
love, Reality and Siobhan

Dear Hank, All your comments that hint at you not being a lifelong Rangers induce this:
What I'm trying to say, is dear sweet King, please don't leave us. 
love, Siobhan

Final Grade: